可惜我是水瓶座

It's been more than 3 months since i returned to my lovely motherland. Actually everything was not so lovely at the beginning included the grey sky, the dusty street, the cold face in every passenger. I told myself that the environment here had been much better than other cities. i got every hug from my friends, my relatives, but later i got to answer everyone about my future.

Yes, the situation is very serious, when everyone expects you must be sparkling. After the cold period during chinese new year, i started my battle struggling for my satisfaction. I tried any way to look for any opportunity as much as i could, emails, job fares, even that i took a coach to Guangzhou only for a chance to hand out my resume. I never felt myself so crazy and desparate before. I wondered, why I was so jealous to offer my tiny little effort to find opportunities when I was in UK? Maybe if i paid my every effort, i could stay in uk. But the answer is that i dont fell like taking risk in cost of my time. i would like to choose a place to start my career asap no matter that the market is not so mature where it will mean more potential progress. But it's too hard to answer people with this controversial or complicated reason, thereby i would like to say, my parents would like me to stay with them.

From Kelon to Flourish investment company, from Zhongshan Pubic Utilities to Guangdong development Bank, Shunde Guangzhou and Zhonshan are becoming my triangle religion. my parents kind of feel tired or anxious for me, they hidely connected to Rural Credit Cooperative without my realization. By the influence of my father, the Hrs was very please to contact me for the interviews and even arrange me from Hr department to Monetary department as I wanted. However, I felt more pressure from then on, since i could tell that my parents expect me to stay in Shunde so much. Off course they said that's for my sake to save the rent. From then on, any time i told them i go to Guangzhou for interviews or job fares, they would become unplease or puzzled or laughing and then tried to teach me "to be practicle" by their experienced life. I felt tired from the journeys or from the preparations, and a lot desparate for not supported by them. When i prepared for an interview in Shenzhen and also thought hard to prepare the reason to reject Rural Credit Cooperatives, my father even said, "拣来拣去,肯定最后拣剩个烂灯盏!" I was so angry, then i left this conversation.

Luckily, i got the offer(although i cant say it's offer so far) from GDB, but they were not excited or at lease happy as i expected. my father had nothing reply, and my mom said, you'd better have preparation to do a stupid job in your internship in the bank. When i told them i rejected an interview from HSBC in Guangzhou, they tried to persuade me to seize it even by cost of the day off from Zhongshan Public Utilities, without my expectation, again. It's so hard to satisfy them. The only way to end up the quarrel i think is to behave as a good girl, to do whatever they told.

BTW, I'm starting my internship in Zhongshan Public Utilities now. Without my expectation, i started to like the life as i'm working not i'm studying. I have met lots of different kinds of people. It's a challenge to deal with quite a lot of new problems. I hope everything is settled asap, to end up the disagreement at my home anymore.